Saturday, January 25, 2014

Alcoholic Anonymous - Daily Ponderables - Together we trudge the Road of Happy Destiny – Friday, 24 January 2014 and Saturday, 25 January 2014 - Daily Reflections “GETTING INVOLVED” and “WHAT WE NEED --- EACH OTHER”

Alcoholic Anonymous - Daily Ponderables - Together we trudge the Road of Happy Destiny – Friday, 24 January 2014 and Saturday, 25 January 2014 - Daily Reflections “GETTING INVOLVED” and “WHAT WE NEED --- EACH OTHER”
There is action and more action. "Faith without works is dead." . . . To be helpful is our only aim.--ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pages 88-89
I understand that service is a vital part of recovery but I often wonder, "What I can do?" Simply start with what I have today! I look around to see where there is a need. Are the ashtrays full? Suddenly I'm involved! The best speaker may make the worst coffee, the member who's best with the newcomers may be unable to read; the one willing to clean up may make a mess of the bank account --- yet every one of these people and jobs is essential to an active group. The miracle of service is this: when I use what I have, I find there is more available to me than I realized before.--From the book Daily Reflections © Copyright 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought for the Day
Alcoholics who are living in a blind alley refuse to be really honest with themselves or with other people. They're running away from life and won't face things as they are. They won't give up their resentments. They're too sensitive and too easily hurt. They refuse to try to be unselfish. They still want everything for themselves. And no matter how many disastrous experiences they have had with drinking, they still do it over and over again. There's only one way to get out of that blind alley way of living and that's to change your thinking. Have I changed my thinking?
Meditation for the Day
I know that the vision and power that I receive from God are limitless, as far as spiritual things are concerned. But in temporal and material things, I must submit to limitations. I know that I cannot see the road ahead. I must go just one step at a time, because God does not grant me a longer view. I am in uncharted waters, limited by my temporal and spatial life, but unlimited in my spiritual life.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that, in spite of my material limitations, I may follow God's way. I pray that I may learn that trying to do His will is perfect freedom.--From the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day © Copyright 1975 by Hazelden Foundation
NA - Just for Today
From isolation to connection
“Our disease isolated us... Hostile, resentful, self-centered, and self-seeking, we cut ourselves off from the outside world.”--Basic Text, page 4
Addiction is an isolating disease, closing us off from society, family, and self. We hid. We lied. We scorned the lives we saw others living, surely beyond our grasp. Worst of all, we told ourselves there was nothing wrong with us, even though we knew we were desperately ill. Our connection with the world, and with reality itself, was severed. Our lives lost meaning, and we withdrew further and further from reality.
The NA program is designed especially for people like us. It helps reconnect us to the life we were meant to live, drawing us out of our isolation. We stop lying to ourselves about our condition; we admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our lives. We develop faith that our lives can improve, that recovery is possible, and that happiness is not permanently beyond our grasp. We get honest; we stop hiding; we “show up and tell the truth,” no matter what. And as we do, we establish the ties that connect our individual lives to the larger life around us.
We addicts need not live lives of isolation. The Twelve Steps can restore our connection to life and living—if we work them.
Just for today: I am a part of the life around me. I will practice my program to strengthen my connection to my world.--From the book Just for Today © Copyright 1991-2013 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Thought for Today
"Gratitude releases us from the 'Gimmies'. If there is to be any peace, it will come through being, not having.--Henry Miller
Buddha/Zen Thoughts
"Manifest plainness,
Embrace simplicity,
Reduce selfishness,
Have few desires.--Lao-tzu
Native American
"Always listen to what the Elders say."--Dona Josefa Medrano, HUICHOL, SIERRA MADRE, MEXICO
In school we have been taught to go to the encyclopedia when we need information about certain subjects. From the time we are little, we have a natural tendency to seek out role models. When we need information about living we tend to seek out books about living. These maybe self help books! The world is full of information. For the Native people, we have our Elders. All races have Elders. Our lives will run much smoother when we listen to the Elders. They don't always tell us what we want to hear but they always tell us what we need to hear. The Elders have the ability to make the truth sweet.
Creator, thank You for the Elders! Help me this day to listen to them.
Keep It Simple
Few people can be happy unless they hate some other person, nation, or creed.--Bertand Russell
In recovery learn to give up hate. We must stand for justice, not for hate. We must learn to respect people. They, in turn, will respect us in most cases. We begin to see how important it is to give up hate--if we want others to care for us. Hate is often our secret. Hate is found deep in our hearts and minds. It eats at our souls. It hurts our spiritual growth. Sometimes people are public about their hate. There are even dangerous groups based on hate. But, the most dangerous hate is the private and unspoken. Do I have public hates? Do I have secret hates?
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, search my hearts and show me any hates I have. Help me rid myself of them.
Action for the Day: I'll list any people, nations, or creeds I hate. I'll pray to have this hate removed. I'll pray for these people, nations, or creeds.
Big Book
"In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while."--Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, page 86
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Mr. X and Alcoholics Anonymous © (thanks Don F.) by Rev. Dilworth Lupton
This was a sermon preached on November 26, 1939 by Dilworth Lupton at the First Unitarian Church (Universalist - Unitarian), Euclid at East 82nd Street, Cleveland, Ohio. Mr. X was Clarence H. Snyder. This was turned into one of the first pamphlets concerning A.A. and was used by A.A. members in Cleveland in the late 1930's and early 1940's. Mr. X and Alcoholics Anonymous
My friend, Mr. X, is a young man with a family.
For five years, to use his own words, Mr. X did not "draw a sober breath." His over-patient wife was about to sue him for divorce. Now for over two years, he has not had a single drink. He maintains that his "cure" is due to the efforts of a group of "ex-drunks" (their own term) who call themselves Alcoholics Anonymous. I have had several opportunities to meet members of Alcoholics Anonymous. Not long ago I accepted an invitation from Mr. X to attend one of their meetings, held in a private home. They are simple affairs: First a brief prayer, then four or five give public testimony to their experiences, refreshments are served, and there is general fellowship. They call themselves religious, but I find no sign of excessive piety, sensationalism, or fanaticism. Furthermore they have a sense of humor, somewhat of a rarity in religious circles.
They are not trying to make other people or the country into "dries." They merely say, "We are the type that can't take it, and we have found a way of leaving it alone." In my own home recently nine members of this group submitted themselves to questions for four hours from a prominent physician and a psychiatrist. Both were impressed by the trim appearance, sincerity, manliness of the ex-victims, and by the seeming efficacy of their methods. As the physician said to me privately, "These boys have got something!" Thank God someone is throwing light on the problem of the chronic alcoholic, a problem that has perplexed men for centuries. There may be a million victims in the United States.
Chronic alcoholism is not a vice but a disease. Its victims know that the habit is exceedingly harmful - as one of them graphically expressed it to me, "I was staring into a pine box" - but they are driven toward drink by an uncontrollable desire, by what psychologists call a compulsive psychosis. Complete abstinence appears the only way out, but except in rare cases that has been impossible of attainment. Religion, psychiatry, and medicine have been tried, but with only sporadic success. The members of Alcoholics Anonymous, however, appear to have found an answer, for they claim that at least fifty per cent of those they interest have stopped drinking completely. From conversations with my friend, Mr. X, and with members of the Cleveland group, I am convinced that this success comes through the application of four religious principles that are as old as the Ten Commandments.
1. The principle of spiritual dependence! Mr. X, who had been drinking excessively for years, found that he couldn't summon enough will power to stop even for a single day. Finally in desperation he consented to a week of hospital treatment. During this time he received frequent visits from members of Alcoholics Anonymous. They told him that he must stop trying to use his will and trust in a Power greater than himself. Such trust had saved them from the abyss and could save him. Believe or perish! Mr. X chose to believe. Within a few days he lost all desire for alcohol. Trust in God seems to be the heart of the whole movement. Religion must be more than a mere set of beliefs; it must be a profound inner experience, faith in a Presence to which one may go for strength in time of weakness. This fact is made quite clear in the book ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS©, which gives the philosophy behind the movement and also the testimony of thirty of those who have benefited. Although written by laymen it contains more psychological and religious common-sense than one often reads in volumes by religious professionals. The book is free from can’t, from archaic phraseology. It gives with skill and intelligence an inside view of the alcohol problem and the technique through which these men have found their freedom. I will let "Bill," one of the contributors to ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS©, describe his own experience. He had been drinking in his kitchen - there was enough gin in the house to carry him through that night and the next day. An old friend came to see him. They had often been drunk together, but now he refused to drink! He had "got religion." He talked for hours...it all seemed impossible, and yet there he was, sober. But let me quote from the book: God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known! Had this power originated in him? Obviously it had not. There had been no more power in him than there was in me at that moment, and this was none at all. That floored me. It began to look as though religious people were right after all. Here was something at work in a human heart which had done the impossible. My ideas about miracles were drastically revised right then. Never mind the musty past; here sat a miracle directly across the kitchen table. He shouted great tidings.* *Alcoholics Anonymous© (New York, AAWS, Inc., 1976), page 11. How hard is it for us moderns to concede - much less express it as our deep conviction - that our inner lives ultimately are dependent upon a power-not-ourselves. Such an attitude seems weak and cowardly. But we go even farther; we suspect that faith in a spiritual Presence outside ourselves is absurd. Why absurd? Our bodies are dependent ultimately upon the physical cosmos, upon air and sunlight, and upon this strange planet that bears us up. Why is it absurd then, to think of our spiritual selves - our souls, psyches, call them what you will - as being dependent upon a spiritual cosmos? Is it not absurd, rather to conceive that the material side of us is part of a material universe, but that our nature is isolated, alone, independent? Is not such an attitude a kind of megalomania? At any rate these ex-alcoholics declare that only when they recognized their spiritual dependence was their obsession broken.
2. The principle of universality! In our great museums one usually finds paintings covering several ages of art, often brought together from widely separated localities - the primitive, medieval and modern periods; products of French, American, English, and Dutch masters; treasures from China, Japan, and India. Yet as one looks at these productions he instinctively feels that a universal beauty runs through them all. Beauty knows no particular age or school. Beauty is never exclusive and provincial; it is inclusive and universal, so, too, in the field of religion. We are beginning to recognize the substantial unity of all religious faiths. Back of all religions is religion itself. Religion appears in differing types, but they are all expressions of one great impulse to live nobly and to adore the highest. This universality of religion is recognized by the Alcoholics Anonymous. Their meetings are attended by Catholics, Protestants, Jews, near-agnostics, and near-atheists. There is the utmost tolerance. It seems of no concern to the group with what religious bodies non-church-going members eventually identify themselves; indeed there is no pressure to join any church whatever. What particularly impresses me is the fact that each individual can conceive of the Power-not-himself in whatever terms he pleases. "Bill" - the writer already quoted in ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS© - makes this tolerance clear when he further narrates his conversation with his ex-alcoholic friend: My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea, he said, 'Why don't you choose your own conception of God?' That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last. It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning. I saw that growth could start from that point. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. Would I have it? Of course I would!* *Alcoholics Anonymous© (New York, AAWS, Inc., 1976), page 12. Perhaps these laymen in Alcoholics Anonymous are laying foundations for a new universal movement in religion. Surely the conventional conceptions of religion have been too narrow. Religion, itself, is far bigger and broader than we thought. It is something we can no more capture through rigid dogmas than we can squeeze all the sunshine in the world through one window.
3. The principle of mutual aid! Consider again the case of Mr. X. When he was being hospitalized eighteen laymen visitors called on him within the brief space of five days. These men were willing to give their valuable time in trying to help a man they had never seen before. To Mr. X they related their own dramatic experiences in being saved from slavery to alcohol, and offered their assistance. Upon leaving the hospital Mr. X began attending the weekly meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. (Editor's note- these were actually meetings of the Oxford Group as Alcoholics Anonymous was not officially named in 1938)! Before long he was following the example of the men who had so generously given him of their help. From what I know of the practices of these members of Alcoholics Anonymous, I feel quite confident that Mr. X this very day is using virtually every hour of his spare time to assist other victims in getting on their feet. As he said to me recently, "Only an alcoholic can help an alcoholic. If a victim of chronic alcoholism goes to a doctor, psychiatrist, or a minister, he feels the listener cannot possibly understand what it means to be afflicted with a compulsion psychosis. But when he talks with an ex-alcoholic, who has probably been in a worse fix than himself and has found the way out, he immediately gains a confidence in himself that he hasn't had in years. He says, to himself, in substance, 'If this fellow has been saved from disaster I can be too'." The weekly meetings of the Alcoholics Anonymous operate on this same principal of mutual aid. The ex-victims bolster up each other's morale through comradeship. Like ship-wrecked sailors on a raft headed for the shore, the bond that holds them together is the same that they have escaped from a common peril. Upon each newcomer is impressed the, necessity, of helping other alcoholics obtain the freedom he has attained. They believe they gain strength from expenditure - not expenditure of money, of which most of them have but little, but of themselves. Said one of them to me, "What I have is no good unless I give it away." There are no dues, no fees, just the sheer pleasure and, in this case, moral profit, that comes from helping the other fellow. This mutual aid acts as a sort of endless chain. Mr. A, Mr. B, and Mr. C help Mr. X out of the frightful mess hi is in; then Mr. X turns around and helps Mr. Y and Mr. Z. These in turn help other victims. As "Bill" writes in ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS©: My wife and I abandoned ourselves with enthusiasm to the idea of helping other alcoholics to a solution of their problems. It was fortunate, for my old business associates remained skeptical for a year and a half, during which I found little work. I was not too well at the time, and was plagued by waves of self-pity and resentment. This sometimes nearly drove me back to drink. I soon found that when all other measures failed, work with another alcoholic would save the day. Many times I have gone to my old hospital in despair. On talking to a man there, I would be amazingly uplifted and set on my feet. It is a design for living that works in rough going.* * Alcoholics Anonymous© (New York, AAWS, Inc., 1976), page 15.
4. The principle of transformation! During the last half century, many able psychologists have turned the searchlight of their investigations on "religious experience." It seems quite clear from these studies that religion consists not primarily in the intellectual acceptance of certain beliefs. It involves even more the transformation of human character. Such transformations have taken place not only in the lives of saints and religious leaders, but in the souls of multitudes of common folk as well. It is a scientific fact, through religious faith people are sometimes suddenly, and sometimes gradually aroused to a new set of interests, are raised from lower to higher levels of existence. Life and its duties take on new meaning, and selfishness (half-conscious often) is displaced by the conscious desire to help other people. If any human being needs such a transformation, it is the chronic alcoholic. He may not be at the point where he is willing to admit that, but his family and friends are! Alcoholism is a sickness, to be sure, but it is unlike any other malady in certain fundamental aspects. Compare for example, the case of the alcoholic with that of a tubercular patient. Everybody is sorry for the "T. B." and wants to help. He is surrounded by friendliness and love. But in all likelihood, the alcoholic has made a perfect hell of his home and has destroyed his friendships one by one. He has drawn to himself not compassion and love, but misunderstanding, resentment, and hate. There seems to be that there is every evidence, the Alcoholics Anonymous group has been amazingly successful in bringing about religious transformation. Note how a doctor describes the effect of this technique on one of his patients: He had lost everything worthwhile in his life and was only living, one might say, to drink. He frankly admitted and believed that for him there was no hope. Following the elimination of alcohol, there was found to be no permanent brain injury. He accepted the plan outlined in this book (ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS©). One year later he called to see me, and I experienced a very strange sensation. I knew this man by name, and partly recognized his features, but there all resemblance ended. From a trembling, despairing and nervous wreck had emerged a man brimming over with self-reliance and contentment. I talked with him for some time, but was not able to bring myself to feel that I had known him before. To me he was a stranger, and so he left me. More than three years have now passed with no return to alcohol.* * Alcoholics Anonymous©, "The Doctor's Opinion" (New York, AAWS, Inc., 1976), page xxix. Every member of this movement declares that since he has come to believe in a Power-greater-than-himself a revolutionary change has taken place in his life; even his acquaintances note a marked change. He has radically altered his attitudes and outlooks, his habits of thought. In the face of despair and impending collapse, he has gained a new sense of direction, new power. I have seen these things with my own eyes. They are convincing, dramatic, moving.
One final word to the members of Alcoholics Anonymous!
Go back to your synagogues and churches; they need you and you need them.
Preserve your principle of Universality, your faith that all religion is one.
Never allow yourselves to be absorbed by any single church or sect.
Keep your movement what you call it now, a "layman's outfit."
Avoid over-organization for religious organizations always tend to follow the letter rather than the spirit, finally crushing the spirit.
Remember that early Christianity was promoted not by highly involved organization, but by the contagion of souls fired with enthusiasm for their cause.
And keep your sense of humor! So far you do not seem afflicted with the curse of over-seriousness.
To doctors and psychiatrists I would say; Be skeptical, investigate this movement with an open mind. If you become convinced of their sincerity and the efficacy of their methods, give these men your approval and open support. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS© ought to have a wide reading by the general public. For one thing the public ought to learn, first hand, the chronic alcoholic is suffering not from a vice, but from a disease; that it is impossible for him to "drink like a gentleman." Moderation for him is out of the question. For him there is no such thing as the single drink. It is one taste, and then the deluge.
Certainly every victim of alcoholism and every friend of victims ought to buy or borrow and read this book, then seek to get in touch with some member of the movement.
The writer of this article will be glad to furnish addresses of the Cleveland leaders.
Or communicate with Alcoholics Anonymous, Box 658, Church Street Annex, New York City.--From the book "How It Worked - The Story of Clarence H. Snyder© and the Early Days of Alcoholics Anonymous in Cleveland, Ohio©" by Mitchell K.
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WHAT WE NEED --- EACH OTHER
. . . A.A. is really saying to the serious drinker, "You are an A.A. member if you say so . . . nobody can keep you out."--WELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, page. 139
For years, whenever I reflected on Tradition Three ("The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking"), I thought it valuable only to newcomers. It was their guarantee that no one could bar them from A.A. Today I feel enduring gratitude for the spiritual development the tradition has brought me. I don't seek out people obviously different from myself. Tradition Three, concentrating on the one way I am similar to others, brought me to know and help every kind of alcoholic, just as they have helped me. Charlotte, the atheist, showed me higher standards of ethics and honor; Clay, of another race, taught me patience; Winslow, who is gay, led me by example into true compassion; Young Megan says that seeing me at meetings, sober thirty years, keeps her coming back. Tradition Three insured that we would get what we need --- each other.--From the book Daily Reflections © Copyright 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought for the Day
We used to depend on drinking for a lot of things. We depended on drinking to help us enjoy things. It gave us a "kick." It broke down our shyness and helped us to have a "good time." We depended on drinking to help us when we felt low physically. If we had a toothache or just a hangover, we felt better after a few drinks. We depended on drinking to help us when we felt low mentally. If we had a tough day at work or if we'd had a fight with our loved one, or if things just seemed against us, we felt better under the influence of alcohol. For us alcoholics, it got so that we depended on drinking for almost everything. Have I gotten over that dependence on drinking?
Meditation for the Day
I believe that complete surrender of my life to God is the foundation of serenity. God has prepared for us many mansions. I do not look upon that promise as referring only to the afterlife. I do not look upon this life as something to be struggled through, in order to get the rewards of the next life. I believe that the Kingdom of God is within us and we can enjoy "eternal life' here and now.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may try to do God's will. I pray that such understanding, insight, and vision shall be mine as shall make my life eternal, here and now.--From the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day © Copyright 1975 by Hazelden Foundation
NA - Just for Today
An added gift
“We see it happening among us every day. This miraculous turnabout is evidence of a spiritual awakening.”--Basic Text, page 51
We watch them walk in to their first meeting defeated, their spirits broken. Their suffering is obvious, and their desire for help even more apparent. They collect a welcome chip and go back to their seats, shaken by the effort.
We see them again, and they seem a little more comfortable. They’ve found a sponsor and are attending meetings every night. They still won’t meet our glance, but they nod their heads in recognition as we share. We notice a spark of hope in their eyes, and they smile uncertainly when we encourage them to keep coming back.
A few months later, they are standing straight. They’ve learned how to make eye contact. They’re working the steps with their sponsor and are healing as a result. We listen to them sharing at meetings. We stack chairs with them afterward.
A few years later, they are speaking at a convention workshop. They’ve got a wonderful, humorous personality. They smile when they see us, they hug us, and they tell us they could never have done it without us. They understand when we say, “nor could we, without you.”
Just for today: I will find joy in witnessing the recovery of another.--From the book Just for Today © Copyright 1991-2013 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.!
Thought for Today
"Pleasure is a by-product of doing something that is worth doing.
Therefore, do not seek pleasure as such. Pleasure comes of seeking something else, and comes by the way."--A. Lawrence Lowell
Buddha/Zen Thoughts
Your search among books, word upon word, may lead you to the depths of knowledge, but it is not the way to receive the reflection of your true self.
When you have thrown off your ideas as to mind and body, the original truth will fully appear. Zen is simply the expression of truth; therefore longing and striving are not the true attitudes of Zen.--Dogen, "The Practice of Meditation"
Native American
"Also ask your heart to purify and cleanse this defect and harmful desire. Ask also the help of the inner father and mother. Every time we eliminate a defect, we build our soul, our inner temple. We ascend like going up a stairway."--Willaru Huayata, QUECHUA NATION, PERU
The building blocks to knowledge and wisdom are constructed through the lessons of our character defects if we constructively review our conduct each day, asking where we are resentful, selfish, dishonest, or afraid. Remember, we need to review constructively, not destructively. Destructive review is when we ask, "what's the matter with me anyway." or "how could I be so stupid?" These question lead to morbid reflection or remorse and seriously affect our self esteem. In constructive review we ask, "What will I do next time?" With constructive review we progressively eliminate the defect and replace it with wisdom.
My Creator, allow me to have my defects because through them I gain in knowledge of YOUR will.
Keep It Simple
The best way to find a helping hand is at the end of your arm!--Swedish proverb.
During our illness, we hurt others. We hurt ourselves. We messed up a lot.
So, a lot of us come to recovery not trusting ourselves very much. The truth is, as addicts, we couldn't be trusted.
But in recovery, we can be trusted again. We can again live and love ourselves. We do this by finding our spiritual center. This is the place inside of us where our Higher Power lives. We turn our will and our lives over to this spiritual center. We do as our spiritual center tells us. And from our spiritual center, we'll find our values. We'll live better lives. We'll come to trust ourselves again.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for helping me Believe in myself again. I'll treat myself with love and kindness. I know YOU want me to.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list four ways I couldn't be trusted during my addiction. I'll also list four ways I can now be trusted.
Big Book
"We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us..."--Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, page 88
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Which Wolf Do You Feed?
An elder Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life.
He said to them, a fight is going on inside me. It is a terrible fight, and it is between two wolves.
One wolf represents fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, pride, and superiority.
The other wolf stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.
This same fight is going on inside of you and every other person.
The children thought about it for a minute and then one child asked his grandfather, which wolf will win?
The old Cherokee simply replied: The one I feed.
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If you're not enjoying your sobriety it's your own damn fault

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