A meal is supposed to be a place where you can laugh, even if you get a chunk of food in your face when somebody spits on you! That's all part of the game. I am not saying that we shouldn't teach good manners. That's another thing. But to make the meal a place of pedagogy is crazy. If people are tense, they risk having constipation or diarrhea.[Jean Vanier in "Living Gently in a Violent World," page 36]
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