Annesley Writers Forum "Broken Free" by Laura Hurd for Saturday, 31 January 2015

Annesley Writers Forum "Broken Free" by Laura Hurd for Saturday, 31 January 2015
I watch in admiration as my daughter, Jessica, runs her hand gently through the auburn mane of her horse, Mitzi, and down the velvety curve of the four-year-old mare’s back. Then, with a twinkle of mischief in her eye, Jessica gives the horse a firm pat on the rump; and Mitzi neighs with a playful quality that sounds surprisingly like a hearty laugh. Jessica puts her nose directly on Mitzi’s, looks her deeply in the eye, and says, “Who’s a feisty, fat little filly? Hmm?” Mitzi’s throat utters a deep gurgle, Jessica responds with an equally unintelligible sound, and the two continue a friendly conversation I cannot understand in the least.
Jessica has a talent for “breaking in” young horses. Mitzi was her first project. I recall a frigid January when Jessica and I tried to get a wide-eyed little Mitzi (her winter coat making her look like a middle-school kid with cowlicks littering frizzy hair) to walk backwards out of the barn stall. The colt was easily spooked, and her eyes shifted left to right searching frantically for the nearest exit. Mitzi has come a long way; she is now a beautiful mare with regal dignity. Her eyes reflect a gentle, calm, mature nature. She has a deep faith in Jessica that enables her to accomplish far more than she could when she jumped nervously at every unexpected sound. She confidently moves wherever Jessica commands her; for she now trusts that Jessica can see what she cannot and will guide her to safety if the need arises.
Modern trainers tend to prefer the word “starting” over “breaking” when it comes to training horses, due to the negative connotations surrounding the latter term. While it’s true some trainers have used harsh, abusive techniques intending to “break” the horse’s willful spirit, most understand that such an approach does not produce the best results. When the horse’s unique personality is left intact and a loving relationship is established with her trainer, she will be far more productive and efficient than if she is beaten into submission. And yet, perhaps “breaking” is still an accurate term. Allow me to explain:
In an untamed horse, an overwhelming “fight or flight” instinct makes self-preservation the animal’s primary obsession. When the horse senses danger, he feels an impulse to flee if at all possible and fight if necessary. A terrified horse might injure or even kill someone nearby – including his human owner – not necessarily out of anger, but simply because his terror dictates he must save himself at all costs. In the wild, horses tend to look to the “Alpha,” the leader of the herd, for cues on how to respond to danger. If the Alpha displays signs of fear, the horse will respond in fear. If the Alpha remains calm, the horse will be less likely to panic. A wise human trainer works to establish him/herself as the Alpha, so that the horse will put his faith in the trainer during moments of uncertainty. A thoroughly trained horse that has a good relationship with her owner will perform tasks she would never attempt in the wild, because her reactive fear has been broken. Above all, she trusts in the voice of her master.
As I watch my daughter interact with her horse, I see the concept of spiritual brokenness in a new light. I have been like the skittish young Mitzi, completely self-absorbed and scared senseless by the unfamiliar. But as I grow in my relationship with Christ, I’m gaining power over the natural instincts of fear and selfishness. I’m learning to look to Jesus as my Alpha-leader. I’m drawing strength from His confidence in the midst of chaos. I’m acquiring peace in His ability to rule over the most terrifying storms of life. I’m finding it easier to obey His voice, even when I cannot see where my foot will land, as I develop trust in His character.
God has “broken,” but not abused, me. He has pushed me far beyond what I thought possible, but not demanded of me more than I could produce. He has been incredibly patient, carefully preserving my individual spirit while chiseling away at what keeps me from being everything He knows I can be. By breaking the iron grip of fear, Christ sets me free. And even though He is – without question – my Master, He has also become my closest Friend.
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