Culture of Life Family Services Newsletter for Friday, 23 May 2014
COLFS Offers Support Group and Educational Classes
Seeds of Faith Family Ministry is now offering prenatal and parenting classes at the COLFS Escondido office. This ministry was developed through St. Mary Star of the Sea Parish in Oceanside by Jane Hodges and me. We are trained educators in Faith Formation as well as prenatal and parenting education.
The parenting program is designed to educate parents on how to raise strong families in a faith-filled Catholic home environment. Classes are also offered for each trimester of pregnancy and newborn care.
A dozen diapers and wipes are given to each family who attends class every week. Baby showers are offered after each 12-week session, celebrating life. The girls earn points for attending class, which then are exchanged for baby items requested by the family. As well as learning life skills, community is built among the participants as we pray and support the families with the love of Jesus Christ.
Currently, parenting classes are offered Wednesday evenings from 6:00 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. Please call (619) 298-2477 for more information.
COLFS Mission Valley hosts a support group called “Women Sharing with Women: Body, Mind and Spirit” on Thursdays at 5 p.m. Michelle Quintanilla, Marriage and Family Therapist intern, leads the group for women who have chosen life for their babies despite the obstacles they face. They pray, share, and learn about healing from the past, honoring their bodies, how to make wise choices, and about healthy relationships and communication. They find guidance, bringing out the best in themselves and living a life based on truth.
For more information about the “Women Sharing with Women” group, call Michelle at (619) 564-3310.
The goal of each ministry is to encourage the lives who attend to live in the truth that God loves them very much.
From the President
We take Mother’s Day very seriously at COLFS. It is our mission to help pregnant moms recognize that it can be the very best vocation a woman can hope for—although she may not see it clearly at the moment she is contemplating an abortion. Through the loving care of our doctors, nurses, medical assistants, and client advocates, COLFS conveys a different side of motherhood that the vulnerable abortion-minded can’t fathom.
For all of our moms who have an appointment with our providers or nurse the week before Mother’s Day, we present them with a red rose to remind them how special they are to us and to their families. This is a tradition that Dr. Delgado started years ago and I know all of our patients appreciate the thoughtfulness.
The month of May, we traditionally honor Mary as our Blessed Mother—Mother to all. Our Lady’s Tea was a sell out again this year and can’t wait to share with you the photos and testimonies from the event in June’s newsletter.
In Memoriam
Mary Cordileone
Nov 16, 1923 - May 8, 2014
At the Tea, I revealed our 2014 Pro-Life is Good Gala speaker. Our 5th Annual Pro-Life is Good speaker is Rick Santorum! Senator Santorum is a great supporter of life and will share his story with us. You will want to get your tables and seats as soon as you can. I will guarantee this year’s Gala will sell out quickly once the keynote speaker is announced to other groups!SAVE THE DATE now for the 2014 Pro-Life is Good Gala and Auction October 4, 2014 at the Rancho Bernardo Inn, 5:30 – 9:00pm
God bless all mothers, for your sacrifice of motherhood.(Scott)
Health Matters: A Change of Perspective Makes All the Difference In the World of an Unborn Child
Recently, I was privileged to help a young pregnant woman who found herself in a crisis. She was sent to me by a pregnancy resource center where she had sought help and support.
I’ll call her Mary to preserve her confidentiality. Mary was about 21 weeks pregnant and had her second trimester ultrasound one to two weeks earlier. That’s the ultrasound scan that young couples await with great anticipation. Normally, the news is something like this: “Your baby looks normal and you are having a ____ (boy or girl).” The bonding rises to a new level when they see the baby moving around inside the uterus with features and anatomy readily identifiable by professional and amateur alike.
Unfortunately, for Mary and her baby, the story was much different. Her baby had low amniotic fluid, absent kidneys, and other abnormalities. The prognosis was not good. She was quickly sent to a perinatologist, a high-risk obstetrician specialist.
This time, a “high level” scan was done to confirm the findings. Everything was just as the first scan revealed, unfortunately.
The perinatologist correctly explained that the baby had a high chance of not surviving to the due date. If the baby were born alive, the chance of survival would be zero without kidneys. The perinatologist urged her to have an abortion so that the baby “wouldn’t suffer.” She had to make up her mind quickly because the larger the baby, the more difficult the abortion.
She came to me not knowing what to do and seeking a second opinion. We sat and discussed the facts of her case. Then I asked about her family and if she had any religious preference. She had both and told me her father was older.
I quickly calculated how I should balance my directness and gentleness so as to deliver a message she could accept. I explained to her that her baby had a terminal illness. Nonetheless, the baby was still alive and likely not suffering in the comfort of her womb.
Next, I explained about perinatal hospice and how we could provide comfort for both mother and child while maintaining the dignity that is due to both. Neither should have to suffer needlessly, and both should be supported endlessly. I asked if her father were terminally ill, would the doctor recommend that his life be ended? Her eyes widened and something clicked. She said she never thought of it that way. Of course, her unborn child deserved to live whatever life God had given. Anything else would not be in keeping with the dignity of a human person.
Mary and her baby do not have an easy road ahead of them. Two things they do have along that road are hope and perspective.
- See more at: http://www.colfs.org/onenewsstory.php?
Crisis Pregnancy: With God and Prayer Anything is Possible
My life has changed so much in the past year... I have made it through days I never thought I would and I am so very happy now. In April of last year, I realized that I was pregnant, and it was not planned by me... only by God. Thankfully, I was blessed by meeting some of the best people I’ve known in my life.
Once I realized I was pregnant, I went to the Internet to find some places for help, as I wasn’t sure how far along I was, and I wasn’t sure what to do. I had just moved to the area from Northern California, and I knew nobody here except my son’s father. We had moved here at the same time, but separately, with the plan to raise our son together and for each of us to move forward in our own lives, since we had come to the realization that our relationship as a couple would never work. On the Internet, I found what I thought was a place that I could go to for an ultrasound to see how far along I was as well as learn about all of my options. Since their website talked all about family planning and their physicians, I thought it would be a safe place to start.
I went to my first appointment, where I expected to get an ultrasound to see how many weeks I was in the pregnancy. When I got into the room, I met what seemed to be a very busy and impersonal Nurse Practitioner. She quickly started the ultrasound and mentioned that my bladder was full and it was difficult to see. I asked her if I should go use the ladies room so she could see better, but she said no. Then she said,“Okay, there it is, and it’s an empty sack.We have to get this out of you. Do you want the abortion pill because you’re only about seven weeks or do you want to schedule for an abortion?” I asked her if she was sure there wasn’t a baby growing in there and was it definitely an empty sack? I thought to myself that God knew this was not the time for us to have another baby since we weren’t even together anymore. I also didn’t have a job yet and was living off of a little money I had saved to relocate.
I was very unsure of this nurse’s quick and rude demeanor. I asked her if I could please use the restroom and if she could do the ultrasound again afterward. She said, “I have a room full of girls waiting, and you’re going to have to wait a long time.” I told her that was fine, I could wait and that I just want to be sure there wasn’t really a baby before I made plans to remove it. When I came back in the room (which was only about 15 minutes later) for the second ultrasound, she again very quickly proceeded, and this time she said, “Oh, there it is. What do you want to do? Go tell the girl down the hall if you want the abortion pill or the abortion. She will schedule it for you.”Then she left the room.
By this time, I was only more confused, scared and unsure of what I was going to do or how I would afford another baby and how would I do it this time alone, since my ex and I weren’t together. I had already called him between the ultrasounds and told him she said it was an empty sack. He was just as relieved as I was since we were in a tough situation. So I had to call him back and let him know that I was in fact carrying our baby... again. I was so unsure of this Nurse Practitioner and what she told me, so I scheduled another appointment with this same “Family Planning” group, but this time with the actual physician at their other location. They would only schedule me if I told them I was going to have an abortion or get the abortion pill. I explained that I had a bad experience with the Nurse Practitioner and she was very unprofessional, and at this point, I really didn’t even trust that she knew I was only seven weeks along, so I needed to see the doctor for another ultrasound. They told me that whichever I chose to do (abortion or the pill), he would do another ultrasound right before. So I said okay and made the appointment for two weeks later knowing that I only wanted to see how many weeks I was along. I thought this was the only way to get an ultrasound without paying cash for it since I didn't have insurance.
Two very long weeks later, my ex-boyfriend dropped me off at the other facility to see the physician. He went on his way to take our son to play practice and confirmed with me before he took off that I was only to get the ultrasound. After I got out of the car, a very friendly, down-to-earth woman approached me and asked if I was going to see the doctor upstairs. I said yes and she proceeded to hand me some pamphlets and told me to make sure I read them before I see the doctor. I said okay and wasn’t sure who she was or what she handed me, but I smiled, said thanks and went upstairs.
As I sat down to fill out my paperwork, I decided to look at what the woman outside had given me. This is where I started reading about malpractice suits and all of these terrible stories of this so-called physician. I then looked around the room and this is when it hit me... a room full of women all about to have abortions. I felt so sick because the room was just filled with negative energy and bad feelings. I crumbled up the papers I had started to fill out and left. Once I got back down to the parking lot, I went over and talked to this wonderful person who opened my eyes to what was going on up in that“doctor’s office”. I told her my experience with the Nurse Practitioner and that I only wanted to confirm that I was pregnant and how many weeks. She told me about Culture of Life Family Services and even gave me a woman’s cell phone number to call so that I could possibly get in to have the ultrasound done that same day (which was a Saturday). She told me they would do the ultrasound for free, and they were a great resource to learn about options for my baby and me.
That following Monday, I went into the Mission Valley office of COLFS and had the ultrasound and learned that, by now, I was nine weeks pregnant. I sat with an amazing nurse and cried and talked about my life, and this is where I was given hope that I could have this baby and they would help me through it. A couple of weeks later, I started weekly meetings with other women who were going through similar difficult times. These meetings and the angels I met at COLFS were how I made it through my pregnancy. I was reminded that, with God and prayer, anything is possible. I now have my eight-year-old son and my beautiful baby daughter, and I am so happy. My children’s father and I are taking care of these precious gifts, and I am so thankful for COLFS and all the wonderful people I’ve met along the way. I sincerely thank you COLFS for everything you’ve done!
Crisis Pregnancy: Couldn't Murder My Own Child
Five months ago, I found out some exciting, but very scary, news. I was pregnant and 16. All I could think about were my parents, as anybody would. But my case was a little different—my mom looks down highly on teen pregnancy. My sister had gotten pregnant at my age and was pressured by my mom to have an abortion.I knew I couldn’t be the murderer of my own child, so I waited till I was 14 weeks, in the hope that my mom would not even consider abortion. I had insurance but knew I could not go through my insurance with this pregnancy because my mom would get the medical bills. So I did my research online and found a place called CAPS, which is where it all began. They did an ultrasound, told me how far along I was, discussed my options with me, and gave me tons of resources—which is when I came across a wonderful woman named Debbie Bradel (who’s seriously awesome). She invited me to a support group. At first, I was hesitant and didn’t know how it would be, but I’m so thankful I went. It became something I looked forward to.
I became closer to God, and it really opened my eyes. God had to be watching over me and had a plan, that this was my time to get pregnant, because time was definitely in my favor. When I found out I was pregnant, my mom had been planning a trip to leave to Seattle for a month. Talk about perfect timing. Because of my circumstances, I chose, for the safety of my baby and me, to wait till she left to tell her.
When I told her, I texted her and did not get a reply till hours upon hours later, at the point I started thinking the text didn’t send or something because she surely would have texted me or called my now, screaming. But, around 8 pm, she texted me, “Goodnight, I love you,” and those 4 words made time stand still. It was a weight lifted off my shoulders to know she still loved me. She then texted me the next day in regard to her feelings and her thoughts, but made sure I knew she still loves me. Never once has she brought up abortion to this day. My mom and I are becoming closer than we’ve ever been, and I couldn’t be more thankful. As for my boyfriend and his family, they have been very supportive and are now excited.
Well, that’s my story. :)
Precious Save
Lectio Divina
“Saint Augustine reminds us that ‘he who would live has a place to live, and has everything needed to live. Let him draw near, let him believe, let him become part of the body, that he may have life. Let him not shrink from the unity of the members.’ By the light of the Holy Spirit, the living essence of Christian morality can be understood by everyone, even the least learned, but particularly those who are able to preserve an ‘undivided heart’ (Psalm 86:11).”(Pope John Paul II, 1993 Encyclical: Veritatis Splendor, The Splendor of Truth)
Pray the following prayer before reading the scripture below: Father, I can’t understand your Word without your grace, I acknowledge my weakness so your power can reach perfection in me. Send your Holy Spirit to remind, teach, and guide me to the Truth. And may I share, as soon as possible, whatever you teach me. Amen.
John 11:21-27 Martha said to Jesus: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would never have died. Even now, I am sure that God will give you whatever you ask of him.” “Your brother will rise again,” Jesus assured her. “I know he will rise again,” Martha replied, “in the resurrection on the last day.” Jesus told her: “I am the resurrection and the life whoever believes in me, though he should die, will come to life; and whoever is alive and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” “Yes, Lord,” she replied. “I have come to believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God: he who is to come into the world.”
What is the Lord saying to you personally? How can you put this into practice in your everyday life?
Reflection: Where do we find life? Where do we find purpose in life? Is it not in the body of Christ? Faith comes through hearing and what is heard is the Word of God. Jesus said He is the resurrection and the life, and if we believe in Him, we will never die. What a promise for those who have lost loved ones. This life is nothing more than a passageway to Heaven where there is no more sickness, no more killing, no more fear, no more loneliness.
To know that we will never die by believing in Jesus makes me want to know more and more about Jesus, know more about His life. The more you know Him, the more you love Him. In knowing Jesus, we want to follow in His footsteps. It is the light of the Holy Spirit that guides our way. He gives us life. How precious is this life. The promise of living forever with those who have gone before us is life-giving in itself; it’s where “the calf and the young lion shall browse together, with a little child to guide them... the baby shall play by the cobra’s den and the child lay his hand on the adder’s lair” (Isaiah 11:6, 8). I think there are lots of little children in Heaven, from the womb to the tomb.
This passage does not talk about adults—it talks about children. Did not Jesus say, “I assure you, unless you change and become like little children, you will not enter the kingdom of God” (Matthew 18:3)? We at COLFS value the life of not only the babies in the womb but the life of the old man or woman who has entered that passageway to Heaven. The Lord is risen, He is alive. He will grasp you by the right hand and lead you and show you the way to go. He will raise you from the dead. Alleluia, Alleluia!
In Jesus’ love, Marie
Save the Date - 2014 Events
August 2nd Annual Pro-Life PicnicOctober 4 5th Annual Pro-Life Gala
October 18 3rd Annual White Mass
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STAFF
Scott Maxwell, President/CEO
George Delgado, M.D., F.A.A.F.P., Medical Director
Karen Saroki, M.D.
Lisa Higgins, MS, PA-C
Mario Mejia, Office Administrator
Debbie Bradel, BSN, PHN, Abortion Pill Reversal
Margaret Sutherlin, RN, ME
Corrie Thomas, RN
Pat Poindexter, RN, CFCP
Catherine Breen, BS, FCP
Erika Santana • Erica Tobin
Laura Flanagan • Mercy Vallejo
Wendy Verdin • Jessica Ortiz
Terri Sawaya • Vianca Dubon
Sonia de Leon • Silvia Calvet
Michelle Quintanilla • Erika Sanchez
Mayra Mancilla • Estabaliz Stommel BOARD MEMBERS
Colleen Maalouf, Co-Chair
Jim Teeter, Co-Chair, Treasurer
Tom Dobrino, Secretary
Bill Goyette
Don Meziere
ADVISORY COUNCIL
Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone
Bishop Cirilo Flores
Fr. Richard Castro, M.C.
Marie Finn
Deacon Keith Esshaki
Philip Rivers
Charles LiMandri, Esq
James Stabile
Mike Murphy
Roger Lopez Culture of Life Family Services - San Diego
5030 Camino de la Siesta, Suite 106
San Diego, CA 92108
(619) 692-4401
(near Mission Valley and Fashion Valley mall)
(view map)
Culture of Life Family Services - North County
362 West Mission Ave., #105
Escondido, CA 92025
(760) 741-1224
(view map)
Know someone who might be interested in the email? Why not forward this email to them.
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