Dear Reader,
One of the most popular pieces on our website this week was a funny little number about Nicki Minaj, the pop star who got called out by the ADL for a Nazi-themed video a few months ago. Now she's on the Bar Mitzvah circuit, singing and dispensing sage advice to teens.NEW YORK
Bar Mitzvah Singer Nicki Minaj Tries To Make It Right With The Jews
Miriam Groner
Web Editor
"Get a load of these little hunks I met last night @ the Bar Mitzvah
Is Nicki Minaj trying to make it right with the Jews? Probably not, but she sure did make a lot of young Jews very happy when she performed at a Bar Mitzvah in New York City over the weekend.
The mega superstar, known for such tasteful
hits as 'Anaconda', 'Va Va Voom', and 'Superbass', performed a set of seven songs at Matt Murstein’s now-legendary Bar Mitzvah. Murstein is the son of New York taxi tycoon, Andrew Murstein, who dished out a reported $300,000 to $400,000 for the performance.
But the curvaceous singer hasn’t always made the headlines for charming the tribe. Her musicvideo for her hit 'Only' caused anuproar last year when it was released featuring distinct Nazi references and imagery. To make matter worse, the video--which has over 50 million hits on youtube-- debuted on the 76th anniversary of Kristallnacht, with the Anti Defamation Leaguecalling it, “a new low for pop culture’s exploitation of Nazi symbolism”. hits as 'Anaconda', 'Va Va Voom', and 'Superbass', performed a set of seven songs at Matt Murstein’s now-legendary Bar Mitzvah. Murstein is the son of New York taxi tycoon, Andrew Murstein, who dished out a reported $300,000 to $400,000 for the performance.Minaj later apologized saying, “I’d never condone Nazism in my art.”
But there was no dwelling on old grievances at the Bar Mitzvah, where the impressive guest list also included NBA legend, John Starks.
The raunchy rapper even dished up some pretty fine advice to the Bar Mitzvah boy, or in Minaj’s own words, her “new boy toy," and his friends.
“Get an education. Stay in school. And don’t be a slouch or a bum,” she said. “And ladies, never let a man have to take care of you. Do you understand me? Be your own woman. Be your own person. Do you understand me?”
Watch Nicki Minaj dishing out advice at the Bar Mitzvah here.
Inset: "With my new boy toy at his Bar Mitzvah. Hi Matt! Mazel Tov!" Via @instagram.com/nickiminaj
miriam@jewishweek.org
Part of our job description here at the JW is tracking the ebb and flow of Jewish New York. Staff writer Amy Clark has the story on a newly Orthodox neighborhood, Marine Park in Brooklyn, a popular section for folks priced out of Midwood.NEW YORK
Orthodox Influx Remaking Marine Park
Opening of second JCC is sign of changing makeup as families priced out of Midwood.
Amy Sara Clark
Staff Writer
Several kosher eateries have sprung up in Marine Park to serve a growing Orthodox clientele. Michael Datikash/JW
When Shalom Gurgov began looking to buy a house 18 months ago, he had hoped to find something close to where he was renting in Borough Park, or perhaps a place in Kensington, where his parents lived. But he saw quickly that staying in either neighborhood wasn’t in the cards.“The prices were too high, or if the price was right, the condition was bad,” he said. The 32-year-old computer programmer and father of four eventually found himself looking in Marine Park, the South Brooklyn neighborhood named for the adjacent 530-acre wildlife preserve and city park that has a golf course, cricket fields, playgrounds and sports fields.
“I noticed there were a lot of young families. We felt like we would fit right in,” he said. In October he and his family moved to a house on Avenue P and East 36th Street, and he hasn’t looked back. “There are playgrounds for the kids. Marine Park itself is close by. It’s pretty quiet. It’s like the suburbs of Brooklyn,” he said.
Gurgov is not alone. In recent years, hundreds of Orthodox families have moved to Marine Park, looking for affordable housing that is walking distance from their families living in Midwood and Flatbush and the kosher amenities offered there. Between the late 1990s and today, the number of Orthodox synagogues in the neighborhood shot up from none to 16, and a second Jewish Community Council of Marine Park building opened in January.
The approximately 1-mile square neighborhood is just west of Midwood and Sheepshead Bay, roughly bordered by Kings Highway to the north, Flatbush Avenue to the east, Avenue U to the south and Nostrand and Gerritsen avenues to the West. It’s long been populated by Irish and Italian civil servants — policemen, firemen and sanitation workers. Twenty or 30 years ago it also had a “substantial Jewish community,” said Marine Park Councilman Alan Maisel, but that generation died off, and membership at the neighborhood’s sole synagogue, Marine Park Jewish Center, dwindled.
Then, in the late 1990s young Jewish families began considering the neighborhood as prices in areas like Borough Park and Midwood soared. In an indication of the changing demographics of the neighborhood, Marine Park Jewish Center, established as a Conservative synagogue in 1951, is now an Orthodox congregation.
“Somewhere around 15 or 17 years ago, I put my very first Orthodox couple in Marine Park; there wasn’t even one [Orthodox] synagogue. ... I was thinking: Are they crazy? Where are they going to go to shul?” said Lisa Lilker Reich, associate broker at Madison Estates, a Marine Park-area real estate firm.Reich said she was surprised at “how fast and furious” the influx of Orthodox families was. “There was a five-year period when it went crazy,” she said.
The growth of the Orthodox community in Marine Park reflects a borough-wide boom in Orthodox communities. In 2002, 37 percent of Brooklyn Jews, or 168,720 people were Orthodox. In 2011, 41 percent of Brooklyn Jews, or 230,051, were Orthodox, according to the UJA Federation of New York’s Jewish Community Studies in 2002 and 2011.
Particularly notable is the explosion of growth of the number of chasidic and black-hat Jews in the Borough. Between 2002 and 2011, the number of charedi Jews living in Borough Park rose by 71 percent and the number in Williamsburg rose by 41 percent, according to the UJA Federation of New York report.
Marine Park is one of several Brooklyn neighborhoods seeing spillover from bursting-at-the-seams Orthodox areas. Bedford Stuyvesant and South Williamsburg have increasingly become home to Satmar Jews spilling over from Williamsburg, and Kensington has been getting Orthodox Jews from Borough Park.
In Marine Park, most of the spillover comes from Midwood, where a three-bedroom home can sell for $900,000, and most of the houses are much larger, in the five- and six-bedroom range, and sell for $1.5 or $1.6 million. In Marine Park, the houses are smaller, and it’s still possible to get a three-bedroom house for around $450,000.
“The prices are affordable,” said Reich.
“It’s unbelievable, the growth of the Jewish community in the past 10 years or so,” said Rabbi Baruch Pesach Mendelson of Kehilah Marine Park, which was founded in 2005 and was one of the first Orthodox shuls to open in the neighborhood.
“Every six months or so, another rabbi opens another synagogue,” Rabbi Mendelson said. Currently the neighborhood has about 16 Orthodox synagogues.
Kehilah Marine Park has a membership of between 40 and 50, which is the norm in the area, said Rabbi Mendelson. A lot of synagogues are in basements, or on the first floor of a rabbi’s house.
“I think in our neighborhood people are used to small synagogues,” he said. “Everybody finds their own little corner and camps there and hopefully enjoys it. If they don’t enjoy the experience, they walk two blocks over to the next one.”
“The location gives it a feel of being slightly outside of the hubbub of Brooklyn Orthodox life, but at the same time it’s close enough that you have all the conveniences. ... People live close enough to walk to their parents and in-laws,” he said.
Today there are about 1,000 Jewish families in Marine Park, but despite the influx, the neighborhood doesn’t have a kosher supermarket or many kosher restaurants. Most Orthodox residents drive over to Midwood to do their shopping. They are already used to buying their food there, and the stores are less expensive than kosher stores that have attempted to make a go of it in Marine Park, said Mendelson.
One institution that has flourished in Marine Park is the Jewish Community Council of Marine Park. It was started in 2008 by Shea Rubenstein, Shua Gelbstein, Yossi Sharf and Jeff Leb, who all lived in the area at the time, to provide social services,legal assistance, computer classes, food assistance, a Sunday girls program and other programs for Jews in the area. The main site on Flatbush Avenue and Avenue P, was joined in January by a second location that includes a large social hall and room for additional social service providers on Quenton Road and East 35th Street.“When a person loses their job there is a huge shame factor,” said Rubenstein, JCC of Marine Park's executive vice president. “They don’t want to go to a food pantry to pick up food they do not need. So instead they ... can essentially walk into the store and purchase anything they need."
The program, said Leb, “really took off” and today distributes $90,000 per year to families in need. “We had government funding, but a lot of the funding was grassroots. It really gave people a good feeling to know that they were helping people around the corner,” he said.
“It’s a very warm, comfortable neighborhood,” said Reeves Eisen, Councilman Maisel’s chief of staff.
“I think it really provides a nice place for people to raise their families,” said Rabbi Mendelson. “It has a strongly religious atmosphere; you can feel it in the streets.”
Most in the Orthodox community are yeshivish, and about 20 to 25 percent are Modern Orthodox, said Rubenstein. The rest, he said, are unaffiliated.
But despite the diversity of affiliation and disparate shul membership, community leaders describe the neighborhood as unified.
“I think the amazing quality about it is that it’s a very nonjudgmental community,” said Leb. In other Orthodox communities, he said, people tend to cluster together based on religious affiliation. But, he said, “Marine Park really is a melting pot ... no judgments.”
amyclark@jewishweek.org
Hella Winston, whose reporting on the charedi community has won numerous awards, is back with a development in the case of convicted child molester Baruch Lebovits. The Brooklyn DA is going to further investigate witness intimidation connected with that prosecution, a source has told her.NEW YORK
Brooklyn DA To Examine Tampering
Source: Thompson to investigate witness intimidation tied to Lebovits abuse prosecution.
Hella Winston
Special Correspondent
Brooklyn DA Kenneth Thompson. WireImage
In a move that advocates for sex abuse victims in the Orthodox community have long urged, the Brooklyn district attorney has launched an investigation into witness tampering in connection with a high-profile abuse case, The Jewish Week has learned.According to a source with knowledge of the situation, the investigation by Brooklyn DA Kenneth Thompson’s office relates to the case of chasidic cantor Baruch Lebovits. His 2010 prosecution and conviction for child sexual abuse and subsequent 10 2/3-to-32-year prison sentence caused a firestorm in the chasidic community, where rumors about his preying on children had circulated for years.
In 2012, Lebovits’ conviction was vacated because of a prosecution error, and a new trial was ordered. Ultimately, in 2014, Lebovits pleaded guilty to the charges and was given a two-year sentence; with credit for time served and good behavior, he spent only a few additional months in jail.
The 2012 reversal of Lebovits’ initial conviction came a year after another man, Samuel Kellner, was indicted for bribing a witness to falsely testify against Lebovits and attempting to extort the Lebovits family in exchange for a promise he would persuade the witnesses against Lebovits to withdraw their charges.
The convoluted case against Kellner, who alleged that Lebovits had abused his son, began to fall apart in the summer of 2013 and was dismissed in March of 2014; the dismissal came after an investigation by then-incoming District Attorney Thompson determined that the witnesses against Kellner lacked credibility to such a degree that the case could not be prosecuted. (Kellner’s attorneys and supporters have always maintained that he was framed in an effort to undermine the case against Lebovits and keep him out of jail).
Among those witnesses was a man named MT, who had, with Kellner’s help, first come forward to detectives as a victim of Lebovits in 2008 but abruptly withdrew from the case in 2009. About a year later, MT told prosecutors that Kellner had paid him to fabricate the allegations against Lebovits, which he then recanted before going on to testify against Kellner in the grand jury.
An investigation by The Jewish Week, begun in 2012, uncovered information that suggested that MT’s withdrawal from the Lebovits case — and his subsequent allegations against Kellner — was likely the result of tampering and intimidation by people with connections to Lebovits. The Jewish Week investigation also found that much of this information, along with other evidence of witness tampering and intimidation in the case, had been in the possession of the district attorney, who nonetheless failed to act on it.
Indeed, the problem of witness intimidation is seen as a significant impediment to getting sex abuse victims in the tight-knit charedi world to come forward to law enforcement rather than bring allegations to local rabbis to handle. And while abuse survivors and their advocates have long spoken out about the issue, almost no one has been charged with these crimes.
In 2000, Bernard Freilich, who had served on former Brooklyn DA Charles Hynes’ advisory board and was at the time a special assistant and spiritual adviser to Superintendent James McMahon of the New York State Police, was charged with threatening an alleged incest victim and her husband in order to prevent them from testifying against him. Freilich was ultimately acquitted, but in the wake of the case, influential members of the charedi community began calling for Hynes’ removal for what the Village Voice wrote was “seen as the latest in a series of wrongs directed against the Orthodox community.”
Hynes, who was seen as having very close ties to the charedi community, did not pursue another Orthodox witness intimidation case again until 2012. At that time, he charged four men with trying to silence the victim of Nechemya Weberman. While all of the men pleaded guilty, only one received jail time, a sentence of four months.
Before Kellner’s case was dismissed, prosecutors had indicated to the court that they were conducting an investigation into one man in particular, Zalmen Ashkenazi, and his connections to the Lebovits family. Ashkenazi’s name first surfaced publicly after The Jewish Week obtained a tape recording in which MT told an acquaintance that he was told to “go against” Kellner by Ashkenazi, who, he claimed, had also supplied him with an attorney.
As it turned out, by that time the Kellner prosecutors had already obtained financial records showing that Ashkenazi was paying for MT’s travel to and from Israel. To date, however, no charges have been brought against Ashkenazi or anyone else in connection with tampering allegations related to the case.
A spokesperson for Thompson declined to comment on the intimidation probe.
Attempts to reach Ashkenazi were unsuccessful and an email to MT’s lawyer, John Lonuzzi, did not receive a response by press time.
Lebovits attorney, Arthur Aidala, also declined to comment.
Kellner attorney Niall MacGiollabhui, who says he is cooperating with the DA’s office, told The Jewish Week, “We know that Ashkenazi and others, such as Joe Levin, who helped a serial rapist of children evade justice, are just the tip of the iceberg.” (Levin is a private investigator who told The New Yorker magazine last November that, while working for the Lebovitses, he had bugged Kellner’s van).
“The test for the district attorney,” MacGiollabhui continued, “is whether the full extent of what lurks beneath will be exposed.”
News of the investigation was greeted with guarded optimism among abuse survivors and their advocates, including Chaim Levin, who says he is personally acquainted with an alleged Lebovits victim. Levin also helped to organize a rally in support of Kellner when he was still under indictment.
“The injustice that was done in the Lebovits case has shattered the trust of so many survivors in the DA’s office,” Levin told The Jewish Week Tuesday.
“This case has served to remind us that power and influence still trumped justice,” he said, “and I’m hopeful that this new development will change that perception for the future.”
For other advocates, that hopefulness is balanced with a sense of skepticism about how far the DA’s investigation will go.
Ros Dann, a spokesperson for Survivors for Justice, an organization that advocates and educates on issues related to child safety, said: “We have been waiting impatiently for this DA to prosecute the bad actors who perverted justice in the Lebovits and Kellner cases. Unfortunately, based upon his performance to date, we are anticipating, if anything, the prosecution of a low-level scapegoat, as opposed to the powerful people who are really behind what went on in these cases, and what continues to go on.
“We call upon DA Thompson to demonstrate that he won’t tolerate the witness intimidation and obstruction of justice that prevents sex abuse victims from reporting these crimes to the police.”
Shabbat Shalom,
Best,
Helen Chernikoff
Web Director
Rabbi Takes To Skies To Rescue Stranded Hikers Via Helicopter In Nepal
Rescue operations reach new heights.
Miriam Groner
Web EditorRelief efforts are well underway in areas devastated by the 7.8 magnitude earthquake that struck Nepal on Sunday, but local rescue operations by Chabad of Nepal just reached new heights. Rabbi Chezky Lifshitz—co-director of Chabad of Nepal with his wife, Chani—took to the skies in a Nepali helicopter to rescue a group of stranded hikers in remote regions hit by the earthquake.
50 Israelis were stuck in several remote villages with no food, electricity or water. An earlier 10-hour rescue mission to deliver food and satellite phones by motorcycle failed due to blocked roads.
Since the quake struck, Lifshitz has been co-ordinating local rescue effortsin conjunction with Nepalese authorities. They use satellite phones fixed with GPS to communicate with many of the Israeli hikers stuck in remote mountain regions like Dhunche, and Syrabrubesi.
The satellite phones were donated to Chabad of Nepal by the family of Israeli hiker, Nadav Shoham, who died in a freak blizzard in Nepal last year.
The Rabbi’s rescue team airlifted 25 to Kathmandu. Amid warnings of a new quake, more hikers remain in various areas of the mountainous region awaiting rescue. Bad weather near the Mount Everest base camp delayed more relief efforts yesterday.
An estimated 10,000 Israelis visit Nepal every year, and following the quake hundreds have been hunkering down, receiving hot meals and access to the internet to communicate with their families back home, at the local Chabad center.
Friends and family of the stranded hikers expressed thanks to the Rabbi and his team on Facebook. “Thank you very much for extracting my brother and his girlfriend. There are no words to thank you for all you are doing,” a woman wrote.
To help with earthquake relief efforts, you can contribute via these Jewish organizations: How To Help
Faigie Levy contributed to this report. miriam@jewishweek.org
JEW BY VOICE
A Voice For Jewish Singles
Erica Brown
Special To The Jewish Week
I know that Freddie Mercury was not referring to the Jewish singles’ scene when he wrote this song. I also appreciate that he might not have been every Jewish mother’s dream on JDate. Yet the lyrics create a certain kind of compassion and dialogue with us that should make us willing to answer his question in the affirmative. Yes. I will find you somebody to love. Or at least I’m going to try.
“O, each morning I get up I die a little,” Mercury sings. Not all of us appreciate the wound that some single people feel because, try as they might — and sometimes they’ve been trying for years — they feel that each rejection is another opportunity that has died. A little of themselves went along with it.
“Take a look in the mirror and cry.” And sometimes that pervasive disquiet, the sense that there isn’t a match out there, fills people with acute anxiety. A friend I know described an enchanted single life that would have been really terrific had she known that she wasn’t going to spend a life without a partner. Self-doubt takes over: Am I loveable if I have not found somebody to love?
“I work hard every day of my life.” Just when the pain creeps in, there’s another voice that says not to look desperate, to keep it inside because it doesn’t have a place in the community conversation. I am strong. I work hard. I can go it alone. Even though the God of Genesis tells us it’s not good for humans to be alone, we may try to convince ourselves that we’re not lonely, just independent, when we can’t find that right someone. A lot of singles have shared with me the additional hurt when someone tells them — often a parent — that they’re not working hard enough at dating or are just too picky.
“I have spent all my years believing in you, but I just can’t get no relief, Lord!” Being single for a long time has prompted many to leave the fold or traditional observance. It’s hard to be single in a faith-based community or any community where family is upheld as a central value. Our Jewish organizations are filled with children and young couples, a nuclear family image that can be visually daunting and off-putting for singles. “I hated going to shul,” said a friend of her single years. Believers may put this question to God: “I am a religious/cultural Jew. I want to be married and raise a family, just like I thought You wanted of me. Why are you punishing me?” We underestimate the spiritual pain of being single and being Jewish.
So what are you doing to help those who want to be married — to find their somebody to love? Everyone needs to lavish attention and adoration on someone. Some of us make excuses for not setting people up: I am not good at it; I just don’t know anybody; I don’t have time; I don’t want to change our relationship. This isn’t my issue.
Wrong. If you live in a community this is your issue because it’s our issue. Make a list. Write down the single people you know. Remember: This is not only about young singles but anyone widowed, divorced or never married. If you can’t come up with anybody, then open your eyes wider.
For her 25th anniversary, a friend celebrated her own marriage by asking friends to come over with a list and description of the single people each knew. In every round we described one person to see if anyone thought there might be a potential match. We followed up by inputting the information into a computer program to save and use it as more such circles met and collaborated. She cared enough to spread the love.
Not everyone wants to be set up (Drop “fixed up”; no one is broken.) For those who do, it’s hurtful when others, especially friends, have done little to help. Make an effort. If it’s not a perfect match, you both got information for next time. Who knows? Someone might walk down an aisle and build a Jewish family simply because you picked up the phone.
We all need somebody to love. Thanks for the reminder, Freddie.Erica Brown, whose column appears the first week of the month, is the author of “Seder Talk: A Conversational Haggada.”
The satellite phones were donated to Chabad of Nepal by the family of Israeli hiker, Nadav Shoham, who died in a freak blizzard in Nepal last year.
The Rabbi’s rescue team airlifted 25 to Kathmandu. Amid warnings of a new quake, more hikers remain in various areas of the mountainous region awaiting rescue. Bad weather near the Mount Everest base camp delayed more relief efforts yesterday.
An estimated 10,000 Israelis visit Nepal every year, and following the quake hundreds have been hunkering down, receiving hot meals and access to the internet to communicate with their families back home, at the local Chabad center.
Friends and family of the stranded hikers expressed thanks to the Rabbi and his team on Facebook. “Thank you very much for extracting my brother and his girlfriend. There are no words to thank you for all you are doing,” a woman wrote.
To help with earthquake relief efforts, you can contribute via these Jewish organizations: How To Help
Faigie Levy contributed to this report. miriam@jewishweek.org
SABBATH WEEK
Echoes Of The Scapegoat
Ora Horn Prouser
Special To The Jewish Week
Shabbat candles: 7:33 p.m.
Torah: Lev. 16:1-20:27
Haftorah: Amos 9:7-15 (Ashkenaz); Ezekiel 20:2-20
Havdalah: 8:37 p.m.
The Yom Kippur scapegoat ritual is both compelling and foreign. It leads us to think about complex issues like sin and purity. This ritual should be something that we can understand and relate to, but as we read, verse by verse [Leviticus 16:5-34], gettingmired in the details, we get confused by who is sprinkling what and when, and we lose sight of the very important statement being made about communal and individual responsibility.
One way to find new meaning in this text is to read it intertextually; that is, to read this text in conjunction with another text to which it relates in theme and content, but to which it doesn’t explicitly connect.
The scapegoat ritual involves Aaron, the High Priest, taking two goats by God’s command and, after selecting one by lots, sacrificing one and sending the second to wander in the wilderness. The entire process achieves the goal of expiating the sins of the priest and of the community. This ritual takes on new and different meaning when we read it alongside Genesis 21 and 22: Abraham had two sons and, following God’s command, “sacrificed” Isaac and sent Ishmael to wander in the wilderness. Remarkably, the actions of Abraham, as a father and as a servant of God, parallel or presage the Yom Kippur ritual performed by Aaron.
I always found it troubling that Abraham sent Hagar and Ishmael away on foot to the desert [Gen. 21:10-21], when it would have achieved the same goal to wait until a caravan passed by and let them join. The intertextual reading, however, makes it clear that the process of ending up in the desert is an important element in the text and that Hagar and Ishmael’s meeting with God in the desert is as much a part of the story as their banishment.
There is also a longstanding question related to the Leviticus text. How can a goat be sent away from God? The intertextual reading reminds us that there is no possibility of being sent “away from God.” Being sent to the wilderness in Genesis means being sent to a place where you meet and connect with God. God appears to Hagar twice in the wilderness, making it clear that in the Bible there is no possibility of being sent “away from God.”
It is always exciting to see new meanings in biblical texts. That excitement, however, is only the first step. It is important to then figure out what new meaning you can draw out of the fascinating connection. While the process of sacrificing and banishing draws the texts together, Aaron and Abraham are very different characters. One is a priest and one is a patriarch. Aaron holds a leadership position in the community, while Abraham’s role is within his own family. God speaks directly with Abraham, but directs Aaron through Moses. Reading these two texts intertextually causes us to bring together these separate areas of biblical life. It makes us look at connections between priests and patriarchs, between ritual and narrative texts, between the communal and the familial, seeing that perhaps they are closer than they seem.
It also connects those who hear God’s word in different ways.
This intertextual reading speaks to communal issues today. Many talk about a divide between Jews whose Jewish focus is in the synagogue and those whose focus is on Jewish life outside the synagogue. The intertextual reading reminds us that suchdistinctions are artificial. We should be able to make connections between the synagogue and the JCC, between social action organizations and learning communities, just as this text brings together the priestly and the patriarchal, the “juicy” narratives of Genesis and the detailed texts of Leviticus. Similarly, there are discussions about the differences between Jewish practice in the home and in the community, between those whose Jewish practice is very individual, and those whose focus is on the community.
Again, this intertextual reading leads us to see the connection between Abraham, the family leader, and Aaron, the community leader, and thus, between those who connect to Jewish life more individually, and those whose relationship to Jewish life is more communal. As the text connects Abraham, who hears God’s word directly, and Aaron, who hears God’s word through Moses, we need to make room today to connect those with varying relationships to God and spirituality.
Just as seemingly unrelated texts, when read together, can lead to new interpretations, new meanings and greater insight into our Sacred literature, so, too, disparate communities and different approaches to Jewish life lead to growth and new understanding when brought into conversation with each other and allowed to interact. In the process of drawing together, these different groups may also draw closer to God.Ora Horn Prouser is executive vice president and dean of the Academy for Jewish Religion.
Echoes Of The Scapegoat
Ora Horn Prouser
Special To The Jewish Week
Ora Horn Prouser
Candlelighting, Readings:Shabbat candles: 7:33 p.m.
Torah: Lev. 16:1-20:27
Haftorah: Amos 9:7-15 (Ashkenaz); Ezekiel 20:2-20
Havdalah: 8:37 p.m.
The Yom Kippur scapegoat ritual is both compelling and foreign. It leads us to think about complex issues like sin and purity. This ritual should be something that we can understand and relate to, but as we read, verse by verse [Leviticus 16:5-34], gettingmired in the details, we get confused by who is sprinkling what and when, and we lose sight of the very important statement being made about communal and individual responsibility.
One way to find new meaning in this text is to read it intertextually; that is, to read this text in conjunction with another text to which it relates in theme and content, but to which it doesn’t explicitly connect.
The scapegoat ritual involves Aaron, the High Priest, taking two goats by God’s command and, after selecting one by lots, sacrificing one and sending the second to wander in the wilderness. The entire process achieves the goal of expiating the sins of the priest and of the community. This ritual takes on new and different meaning when we read it alongside Genesis 21 and 22: Abraham had two sons and, following God’s command, “sacrificed” Isaac and sent Ishmael to wander in the wilderness. Remarkably, the actions of Abraham, as a father and as a servant of God, parallel or presage the Yom Kippur ritual performed by Aaron.
I always found it troubling that Abraham sent Hagar and Ishmael away on foot to the desert [Gen. 21:10-21], when it would have achieved the same goal to wait until a caravan passed by and let them join. The intertextual reading, however, makes it clear that the process of ending up in the desert is an important element in the text and that Hagar and Ishmael’s meeting with God in the desert is as much a part of the story as their banishment.
There is also a longstanding question related to the Leviticus text. How can a goat be sent away from God? The intertextual reading reminds us that there is no possibility of being sent “away from God.” Being sent to the wilderness in Genesis means being sent to a place where you meet and connect with God. God appears to Hagar twice in the wilderness, making it clear that in the Bible there is no possibility of being sent “away from God.”
It is always exciting to see new meanings in biblical texts. That excitement, however, is only the first step. It is important to then figure out what new meaning you can draw out of the fascinating connection. While the process of sacrificing and banishing draws the texts together, Aaron and Abraham are very different characters. One is a priest and one is a patriarch. Aaron holds a leadership position in the community, while Abraham’s role is within his own family. God speaks directly with Abraham, but directs Aaron through Moses. Reading these two texts intertextually causes us to bring together these separate areas of biblical life. It makes us look at connections between priests and patriarchs, between ritual and narrative texts, between the communal and the familial, seeing that perhaps they are closer than they seem.
It also connects those who hear God’s word in different ways.
This intertextual reading speaks to communal issues today. Many talk about a divide between Jews whose Jewish focus is in the synagogue and those whose focus is on Jewish life outside the synagogue. The intertextual reading reminds us that suchdistinctions are artificial. We should be able to make connections between the synagogue and the JCC, between social action organizations and learning communities, just as this text brings together the priestly and the patriarchal, the “juicy” narratives of Genesis and the detailed texts of Leviticus. Similarly, there are discussions about the differences between Jewish practice in the home and in the community, between those whose Jewish practice is very individual, and those whose focus is on the community.
Again, this intertextual reading leads us to see the connection between Abraham, the family leader, and Aaron, the community leader, and thus, between those who connect to Jewish life more individually, and those whose relationship to Jewish life is more communal. As the text connects Abraham, who hears God’s word directly, and Aaron, who hears God’s word through Moses, we need to make room today to connect those with varying relationships to God and spirituality.
Just as seemingly unrelated texts, when read together, can lead to new interpretations, new meanings and greater insight into our Sacred literature, so, too, disparate communities and different approaches to Jewish life lead to growth and new understanding when brought into conversation with each other and allowed to interact. In the process of drawing together, these different groups may also draw closer to God.Ora Horn Prouser is executive vice president and dean of the Academy for Jewish Religion.
A Voice For Jewish Singles
Erica Brown
Special To The Jewish Week
Erica Brown
I’m about to enter a parking garage. The static is just starting on the radio when I put the car into reverse and park. One of my favorite songs is on, and I wasn’t prepared to lose it in a car garage: Freddie Mercury’s “Somebody to Love.” I cannot actually write those words without hearing his unusual, high-pitched, magical voice singing the lyrics. Because I stopped just to listen to the song, I heard it with increased intensity.I know that Freddie Mercury was not referring to the Jewish singles’ scene when he wrote this song. I also appreciate that he might not have been every Jewish mother’s dream on JDate. Yet the lyrics create a certain kind of compassion and dialogue with us that should make us willing to answer his question in the affirmative. Yes. I will find you somebody to love. Or at least I’m going to try.
“O, each morning I get up I die a little,” Mercury sings. Not all of us appreciate the wound that some single people feel because, try as they might — and sometimes they’ve been trying for years — they feel that each rejection is another opportunity that has died. A little of themselves went along with it.
“Take a look in the mirror and cry.” And sometimes that pervasive disquiet, the sense that there isn’t a match out there, fills people with acute anxiety. A friend I know described an enchanted single life that would have been really terrific had she known that she wasn’t going to spend a life without a partner. Self-doubt takes over: Am I loveable if I have not found somebody to love?
“I work hard every day of my life.” Just when the pain creeps in, there’s another voice that says not to look desperate, to keep it inside because it doesn’t have a place in the community conversation. I am strong. I work hard. I can go it alone. Even though the God of Genesis tells us it’s not good for humans to be alone, we may try to convince ourselves that we’re not lonely, just independent, when we can’t find that right someone. A lot of singles have shared with me the additional hurt when someone tells them — often a parent — that they’re not working hard enough at dating or are just too picky.
“I have spent all my years believing in you, but I just can’t get no relief, Lord!” Being single for a long time has prompted many to leave the fold or traditional observance. It’s hard to be single in a faith-based community or any community where family is upheld as a central value. Our Jewish organizations are filled with children and young couples, a nuclear family image that can be visually daunting and off-putting for singles. “I hated going to shul,” said a friend of her single years. Believers may put this question to God: “I am a religious/cultural Jew. I want to be married and raise a family, just like I thought You wanted of me. Why are you punishing me?” We underestimate the spiritual pain of being single and being Jewish.
So what are you doing to help those who want to be married — to find their somebody to love? Everyone needs to lavish attention and adoration on someone. Some of us make excuses for not setting people up: I am not good at it; I just don’t know anybody; I don’t have time; I don’t want to change our relationship. This isn’t my issue.
Wrong. If you live in a community this is your issue because it’s our issue. Make a list. Write down the single people you know. Remember: This is not only about young singles but anyone widowed, divorced or never married. If you can’t come up with anybody, then open your eyes wider.
For her 25th anniversary, a friend celebrated her own marriage by asking friends to come over with a list and description of the single people each knew. In every round we described one person to see if anyone thought there might be a potential match. We followed up by inputting the information into a computer program to save and use it as more such circles met and collaborated. She cared enough to spread the love.
Not everyone wants to be set up (Drop “fixed up”; no one is broken.) For those who do, it’s hurtful when others, especially friends, have done little to help. Make an effort. If it’s not a perfect match, you both got information for next time. Who knows? Someone might walk down an aisle and build a Jewish family simply because you picked up the phone.
We all need somebody to love. Thanks for the reminder, Freddie.Erica Brown, whose column appears the first week of the month, is the author of “Seder Talk: A Conversational Haggada.”
THE NEW NORMAL
Learning To Advocate For Myself
Emanuel Frowner
Emanuel Frowner
My dad homeschooled me from the sixth grade until I got my GED in 2000. The reason was because he did not want me to be bullied by the other students. Homeschooling helped me learn how to work extremely hard. I studied hard for exams, wrote papers, and completed extra credit assignments. But I sometimes wished that I could have spoken up more about wanting to be around others who were similar to me. While I was not as comfortable advocating for myself when I was younger, many of my experiences since then have taught me how to be better at speaking up about the accommodations I need.Self-advocacy is important for individuals like me on the autism spectrum because it gives us a sense of our own identity. It lets us find who we really are without someone else dictating it for us, and allows us to make choices we will be happy with in the long run.
Being a self-advocate means knowing your strengths and weaknesses, and asking for help when you really need it. Self-advocacy can also mean educating others about people with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). That’s why I’m speaking at UJA-Federation of New York’s Hilibrand Autism Symposium on April 28. I am interested in helping teachers and professionals who work with those on the spectrum because it is important that they understand how individuals with ASD learn, think, and communicate their ideas.
I didn’t start advocating for myself overnight. But in my late teens and early 20s I started going out independently, and I went to college, which gave me more opportunities to make decisions for myself. For example, after my first semester at Bronx Community College, I decided to choose liberal arts as a major rather thanbusiness administration because even though I was not really sure what I wanted to do with my life, I knew I wanted to be well-rounded.
I went for a diagnostic assessment in January of 2006. I was going through a lot at the time and even though I was living on the campus at St. John’s University, where I was now in school, I did not have any close friends.
My oldest brother Blair had done some research and sent me a link from the Seaver Autism Center at Mount Sinai. He had tried to get me some help for years, but he told me that my dad was against it because he thought if I got a diagnosis there would be a stigma attached.
So I did a couple of interviews and I took a few tests and it was proven that I was on the autistic spectrum. When I found this out, I was happy because it was a blessing in disguise. I started reading up on it and a lot of things related to what I had gone through in the past and what I was still going through. My diagnosis confirmed that my problems were not disciplinary, but were related to social, emotional and communication issues.
When I got the diagnosis, a doctor told me about Adaptations, a program at the JCC Manhattan that holds social events for people on the spectrum and with other developmental and learning disabilities. Adaptations helped me in numerous ways. It increased my social skills by helping me pay attention to others. The program also helped me learn from social mistakes I’d made in the past. I made lots of friends over the years, both male and female, and I was even in a relationship.
Being in Adaptations for a long while has helped me become a self-advocate. I was able to observe a few people and how they communicate with others. I know that some people in the program will speak up quickly and loudly if someone says something that they may find offensive. For someone like me, because of the way I was raised, I pick my battles and I don’t speak up about every little thing that may seem frustrating to me. But I have gotten better at speaking up when someone interrupts me or when someone answers for me. I also do it in a nice way so that I won’t hurt their feelings.
Now that I am better at speaking up for myself, I also want to find more ways to help others. I currently work as a special projects assistant at the NYC Autism Charter School, and as a research assistant at the Seaver Autism Center at Mount Sinai. I don’t work directly with patients or the students but I enjoy contributing to the important work of these organizations.
I have created a meaningful life for myself. The advice I would give to others would be to do your best to improve yourself on your terms, not anyone else’s. Have a few role models who make a positive impact on others. And remember that it is alright to make a few mistakes because that is really how you are going to learn.Emanuel Frowner grew up in the Bronx. He works as a research assistant at Mount Sinai’s Seaver Center and as a special project assistant at the New York Center for Autism Charter School.
Douglas Bloomfield
It struck me while watching that heroic mother in Baltimore emph
atically educating her son (see it here) about the perils of rioting and throwing rocks at police that she should be a role model for Israeli and Palestinian mothers.
Toya Graham saw her son Michael, 16, on TV and immediately went out on the streets looking to literally knock some sense into his head.
"I don't want him to be a Freddy Gray," she explained, referring to the Baltimore man whose death after suffering severe injuries while in police custody ignited the protests.
Graham's profanity-laced lecture and the public humiliation her son suffered have people in Baltimore calling her "Mom of the Year."
The Israelis and Palestinians could use a lot of mothers like Toya Graham. Peaceful protests are fine, she said, but violence is counter-productive. The Middle East already has an abundance of martyrs and people for whom throwing rocks is a preferred mode of communication.It's time to send in the moms.
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