Greetings Shawnee Family!
I spent the first half of the day running around in order to obtain a Kansas Drivers License, a VIN inspection report, and finally our new license plate for one of our cars.
It was quite the day! I had a lot of time to myself and was able to think about quite a bit. I made a few observations about the whole process.
There were three separate entities I had to visit today.
1- The Driver’s License Office
2- The Kansas Highway Patrol Inspection Office
3- The Motor Vehicle Office
Phew… I had no idea there were so many steps!
Now, 2 out of these 3 places have this wonderful text to wait in line feature. It allows a person to check in ahead of time and go about errands for the day and report to the office only about 15 minutes before one actually needs to be there. What an amazing invention!
Unfortunately, one of the three locations I visited today did not have this glorious feature: the Kansas Highway Patrol Inspection Office. I walked into that cramped, depressing room and knew that I now had about 50 new friends for the next hour and a half.
Little did I know that growing up in Russia as a Missionary Kid had uniquely prepared me for just such a moment. You see, Russians are all about lines and long drawn out processes with multiple frustrating hoops to jump through.
I felt very at home with the cranky receptionist, the disgruntled workers, and the general lack of joy in the whole place. I am good with lines. Russians love lines.
There was a time when we first moved to Russia in the early 1990’s where if a line was forming down the sidewalk ending at a large truck, everyone got in the line. Reason being, there might very well be something at the front of that line that a person may need! After standing in the line for a few minutes people at the back would begin to ask the people ahead of them “what’s in the truck?” After a long game of “telephone” the response would return… “sweet potatoes!” Those in line would think if they needed sweet potatoes or not and either stay or exit the line. So, lines are something I am used to.
Russia also prepared me for just such a day because I was responsible to pack my backpack with things that would help keep me occupied on long trips or while waiting in long lines. So, I had my backpack packed today with all sorts of books, my laptop, my phone as a wifi hotspot, etc. I was ready to go!
It was evident that everyone else was not ready for the long waiting experience. I had a choice in that moment to join with my 50 new friends and be frustrated with a situation I could not control or make the most of it. I chose the latter.
A few minutes after I sat down, a family with a small baby walked in and my heart sank. Not for myself, but for this precious mom and baby as they had a long wait ahead of them.
I felt something in me start to stir and I wanted to suppress what I was feeling. Growing up in Russia also taught me to blend in, go with the flow, don’t make waves… I felt the urge to just sink into my car and blend in.
I tried to suppress what I was feeling I needed to do, but it was so overwhelming. I found myself standing up and walking over to the cranky receptionist who is also know as, “the keeper of the sign in sheet.” I asked if I could pose a question to everyone in the waiting area for permission to have the mother with the baby go next in line. She looked at me like I had just slapped her across the face and said, “well, that is odd, but you are welcome to try.” So… I turned around and put on my “big girl voice” and asked, “would you all be okay with letting this mom go next?”
I was ready for everyone to be so excited to let this mom go next, but I was met with… crickets. Nothing. It was so awkward. The mom said, “thank you so much, but we are okay.” I felt let down by people in that moment. Little did I know that the mom was only two spots away from going and I was thankful when she was able to have her turn.
I sheepishly went back to my seat, got my computer back out, and tried not to draw too much more attention to myself. I was so embarrassed. I made an absolute fool of myself.
I sat there and processed what had happened and came to these conclusions:
… people are inherently selfish. It’s true, we are born selfish. We have to LEARN to care for others and these are lessons we can only truly learn by being in relationship with God.
… I made a fool of myself, but I don’t regret it and I would do it again.
… Christ came and died for us, some would say Christ made a fool of himself for us, so that we might come to know him. If Christ scarified so much for us, how much more can I make a fool of myself in order to care for others?
I’m not looking for praise for this thing I did today. I am actually a little ashamed that I was trying so hard to suppress what I felt I should do. I felt this feeling in the pit of my stomach, my heart was racing, and my mind was clear. I knew what I needed to do, but I really didn’t want to do it. Although this was the case, I also realized that I would regret not speaking up. I would always wonder what would have happened.
I share this to say, caring for others is hard work. Sometimes we want to talk ourselves out of it, sometimes (most of the time) it is an inconvenience to us, and sometimes we even feel like a fool.
If Christ sacrificed so much for us, then we can certainly go out of our way to make a difference in this world.
So, go out there and don’t be afraid to make a fool of yourself caring for others.
Who knows... it might just make all the difference in the world.
Grace and Peace,
Pastor Cara
Contact:
Shawnee Church of the Nazarene
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